Monday, December 3, 2007

miss sp:
how should one go about impressing children (and adults) that it is more blessed to give than to recieve?
The rod, dear reader. The rod.

anonymous said...
Mrs SP,
In your humble opinion, is it true that the tradition of Christmas trees has roots in paganism?

The amazing thing about Christmas trees is, they have no roots. If, at one point, they were rooted in paganism, they were then heartlessly chopped down and shipped to Walmart, where they are from then on unrooted. And eventually, they are potted, and then, in due time, return to the earth. Although, some might argue that Walmart itself is rooted in paganism. Party poopers.

anonymous said...
How is Christmas celebrated in Australia?
Australians do not celebrate Christmas.

anonymous said...
Mrs Smarty P.,
Is it proper etiquette to eat cranberry sauce with your hands?
It is not proper. Please remove your hands from the keyboard immediately.

Now, some of you are asking... "Did she really DEFY the MOG and purchase a potentially pagan tree? What hath God wrought?" If so, you talk funny. But I will tell you. The Scrooge MOG did not want a tree. He vaguely alluded to forbidding me to buy one. Not concretely. (he knows better). It's a long story, but someone in our marriage went to a great deal of work and got a $100 gift card online for her their efforts. Which, after 6 weeks, arrived in the mail. Then, someone other than the party of the first part threw away said gift card because it was, and I quote, "trash in the van".

I climbed into the dumpster to retrieve it. I called to activate it, and there was no activation code. So, I climbed back into the dumpster and retrieved the letter with the code. I then spent $40 of that hard earned card on a tree, which I brought home by myself. It is over 8 feet tall. I am just over 5 feet tall. I then wrestled it in my house, and set it up and decorated it. By myself. Which makes me hardcore. When the Man of God got home and saw the tree, he was highly amused. He is quite happy to not have to have done anything. Next year, I am hoping he will have developed Merry Christmas genes and be jolly and bright.


  1. merry christmas genes are hard to come by, or so i hear
    one should call a special prayer meeting with the purpose of crying out for the mog's eyes to be opened to the truth of christmas & pleasing his family
    or perhaps not
    a christmas elf might do the trick!

  2. Since Jessica is just over five feet, she is a Christmas elf herself.

  3. I was laughing at that story. The thought of Jessica, who doesn't like to go outside and get dirty, jumping into a dumpster twice is very amusing.

    Mrs SP- very good Christmas tree, paganism answer.

  4. I can't be the only person who wants to comment on the blog anymore, can I? Where are the peoples???

  5. Mrs. SP lost her credibility with me. I've seen Christmas lights and Santa hats adorning palm trees on the beaches of Moolooaba in December. Someone needs to set that sheila straight I reckon...

  6. Off subject:

    The best thing to hit the internets...

  7. Our first Christmas.... I dove into a dumpster to retrieve... it was Dec 19th, i think, or some time after school let out.... plenty of good life left in its branches....and i had married a scrooge myself.....

    moo hhhaaa ha aahhaaa

    i went to the Five and Dime Store (i know, you guys have never of those...) and bought 3 packages of plain shiny ornaments, gold, red, blue.... and there are only a few of those left in our box after 26 Christmases together....

    now, if i could just FIND the boxes! there are too many out there!

    coffee is set to brew at 6:26 a.m. and i hear it's going to freeze, and no one knows exactly how to work the upstairs heater/ac.... thankfully the downstairs one is an older fashioned one and is "do-able"

    i am crazy to be up this late

    oh and btw... did you hear that Lin got a RING?!?

  8. WOOW Lin Got a Ring
    Jenn has a bun in the oven
    VKG put up a TREE (scrooges mum)
    Jess dumpster dives
    Josh only Blogger
    Santa on the Beach
    LoriBeth reads books on line
    .......and Five Golden Rings

    four calling birds-Three French Hens..two TURTLE DOVES.........

    and a partridge in a pear tree!

  9. LEWISVILLE, Texas — Lewisville police had to hop to it to catch a kangaroo who fled from a veterinarian's yard.

    "Maynard" the red kangaroo is back at an animal hospital after a frolicking chase that was videotaped by a patrol car's camera.

    Police joined animal control officers Sunday after getting a call about a kangaroo dashing around a neighborhood.

    Their footage shows Maynard bouncing around while people chase the the 18-month-old, 3-foot-tall kangaroo.

    Dr. Kyle Jones took Maynard home for the weekend so the animal could graze and run in the vet's back yard. A wooden gate blew open and Maynard got out.

    The animal eventually will be placed with a zoo.


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