Tuesday, June 17, 2008


Inevitabilities of life:
If I have to go somewhere, one child will lose a shoe 3-5 minutes before we have to be in the car. At least one child will spill something on themselves. Poopy diaper(s).

If I mop the floor, within one hour of the floor drying, someone will spill a whole bowl of something, probably something red like chili, or sticky and impossible to sweep, like rice or macaroni and cheese.

If I answer the phone, all hell will break loose. Especially if I am talking to a doctor or government type.

If we go to the park, or an indoor playground, at least one child will have a dirty diaper. Especially if I forgot to bring wipes. This one is so predictable, I could market it as a laxative.

If all three children are asleep, and I am cleaning, even vacuuming in their room, they will stay asleep. If I sneak away to a private room, someone will wake up. Especially if I am eating chocolate very quietly.

If I kick everyone outdoors, they will stand at the door looking in. If they can't go out, they stand looking out.

If I wear white, I will be clutched by peanut butter hands, or tomato saucy ones. If I wear black, it will be snot, or cheese sauce.

If I complain about having kids, even jokingly, I remember how desperately I prayed for them, and how lonely I used to be.

Bring on the cheese sauce.


  1. I love you Jess...

    Now you know why I spoon feed all grandkids til they are embarrassed by it. No age limit....as long as they're kool, I'm kool...

    Less mess.......one bowl....shared germs.....hardly any disasters.

    I know you love it......

    Hey! I hear thunder....

    Fan Dad Gum Tastic!

  2. now you guys know that I'm not stupid - and i know how to follow directions and all.... but, I'm SERIOUS! the thing won't ALLOW me to change the picture! it's possessed by the KrisKringle spirit!

    and I'm getting tired of it....

    Jess, i'll send you my info - and YOU fix it!

  3. Thanking you in advance,

    The Christmas Forever Bee Lady

  4. at least I'm synchronized with myself up there...

    it can be kind of humorous watching one's self doing the Christmas dance in June!

  5. I am humming Jonny Langs...THANKFUL
    to the dancing Christmas munchkins

  6. MamaPC
    don't feel bad........

    Jess changed mine for YEARS even a couple of times after I had suppossedly learned how.....

    She loves it......

  7. the weird thing is.... i KNOW how to do it... i am not SHTUPID! i truly did it a many a time... but now the SHTUPID C.Bee is stuck on there! it's like it has a virus or something and demands to remain....

    the demanding remaining bee

  8. do you truly need some twin sheets? i think i have a few....

    and some clothes for small women, teen girls.... from Linds' give-aways.... she's been cleaning out closet and so has HC... so.... we may have things for you....

    nothing new

    and we are BROKE from wedding....

    so.... if you need a few used items, please call and we'll organize a time to meet....

  9. YES

    We usually bring everything USED.

    NEED Twin sheets YES...........

    I will email you......we also need a lot of other used items.


    God is so good.....

    Usually have a load tightly squeezed in of useful used items and diapers......and a few of their requests..

    God is so funny

    This time......they are getting a load squeezed in of items that they requested and they are BRAND NEW or very gently used....

    God has up-graded the Orphanage.


    We have been in BOOT CAMP and now this is the real thing!

    God is so awesome......and prefers to live OUTSIDE the box I had HIM in.

  10. VKG- I never asked. Did wrapping the lawn mower in plastic work to contain the gas fumes last time?

  11. I love this one, it stands true for cats and dogs too.-G

    If I kick everyone outdoors, they will stand at the door looking in. If they can't go out, they stand looking out.

  12. I have a black eye, a jumperoo hit me in the head. Many people are making jokes about Mike. My boss asked me very gently " What happened?". You know I work for a resale shop that supports a woman's center for battered and abused women.

  13. Nini and Kai were there when it happened. He wanted to kiss it.-G


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