Sunday, February 21, 2010

on adopting, and the why and wherefore

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If you're a regular reader on this blog, then this entry will be so last decade to you, as you are on the cutting edge of all things Yablonski. If, however, you are new here, lemme tell you about us, and adoption, and the combination of us and adoption.

In my heart, I started this process years and years ago. Our firstborn, Richy II, was born at 24 weeks in 1999. We decided after his traumatic birth and severe brain damage, that we were not going to pursue another pregnancy in the foreseeable future, and I remember Richy and I attending an international adoption orientation in what must have been 2002, but the timing wasn’t right. Still, it was a dream in my heart.

In 2004, we gave birth to the twins and spent a sweet 2 days with them before they died. A year or two after that loss, we began exploring adoption again, ordering information packets from all the agencies in a reasonable distance, and studying. One night stands out, when Richy was gone, doing ministry, and I watched Steven Curtis Chapman’s video “When Love Takes You In” and wept for the children.

There was something birthed in me that day, a pale and removed but still deep empathy for orphans, living in orphanages and on the streets, longing for families. It still wasn’t time, though. We were too young, and too broke to really be considered by most agencies.

Over the next two years, we fought hard and were so blessed with the premature but pretty healthy Toby and Brynn. Even with my arms full to overflowing, though, I knew we weren’t through. The dream in my heart and the ache for the orphans never faded. I studied and I prayed and I waited.

March of 2008, Richy and I flew to Alabama for theCall, and I wept uncontrollably as a woman told the story of a dream she had, where a tall young African-American man hugged her and called her Mama. She went on to tell of an emergency adoption that happened in the days following that dream, and then her husband held up beautiful 2 year old Jamaal. My heart was completely wrecked and I surrendered any desire for future pregnancies, totally content and free to give my heart to another woman’s child. I knew adoption had become my first choice, and not second-best in my heart.

In January of this year, we spent several weeks in Houston with pro-life organizations, praying and crying out to God for the ending of abortion, especially in minority communities. During that time, the last roadblocks in Richy’s heart came down, and we knew. It is time.

So, we have begun. Our hope is to adopt what has statistically become one of the most difficult children to place, an African-American male baby. We are months, maybe a year away from a baby, depending on finances. There is a lot of paperwork and homework to be done, and a lot of money to raise. I’m looking into fundraiser ideas and maybe even a part-time job.

The hardest part is the first $2-3000, for all the application process and the homestudy. Once we have an approved homestudy, we can apply for all kinds of grants and programs, but we need a lot of help to get to that point. We have raised almost $700 in about 4 days- an excellent start! So we are asking for your help. Even if you only have $5 to give, it adds up, and you are sowing into a child’s future.

Join us, and let’s take some destinies back. You can click on the Chipin link below, or email me for our mailing address.


  1. In January God said "go" to us too. He's moving. I will watch your journey and pray with you.


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