Monday, March 10, 2008

So, what's the point of blogging at this late of an hour? Well, if for no other reason, to entertain Nate, who is bored out of his mind at the rodeo. He's working there, y'all. Normal attendees would not be bored, and neither would bullriders. But Nate is neither of those. So here you go.

I began this morning by- well, Richy began by dropping himself off at his class, and then I took the wheel. Much like Jesus in the proverbial song. I then missed the freeway entrance and drove 30 minutes in the wrong direction before the ol' light came on. The brain light, that is... waaaaaaiiiittt.... this not 71 to airport... this 470 to Wichita... what I do now??? ...........

Call to the MOG, exit, u-turn... drive for one forever to the airport. Successfully drop Mama off and find the correct freeway, and spend the next 20 minutes on course. Then, I took a detour to some large water industry district in Kansas. Good times.
Another call to the MOG who had by this point spent a lot of class time out of class. He hung up to map my coordinates, and before he called me back I randomly chose the proper direction and found the correct road. Made it home, folks. HOURS later.

But we only had time to catch an episode of Barney and then we had to pick up Daddy and head to the DMV. Say it slow, because that is appropriate. Deee.........emmmmmmm.....veeeeee.....
We eventually got Missouri drivers licenses, and simultaneously got poorer. Highway robbery.

Then we went to the office of the party of the first part to get our van registered. And waited. Did I mention we have three children? And did I mention that Toby is TWO? He got our tax dollars worth of climbing chairs, over, under, around... meeting passersby and frightening strangers with a smile... anyway. We were number 7. I heard them call out 6, and then moments later, 8. Being a pretty Smart Egg, I reasoned something was amiss. I of the floating freeways, had been skipped. I rose and cried out for justice, and I was heard. Eventually. So the party of the first part said I needed documentation of such and such and wrote things down and sent me over to the party of the second part, who directed me to the back of the line. You won't believe this, but we were all getting a little tired of the ol DMV by this point. To cut a long, long story, shorter.... they couldn't make the computer work, the supervisor wasn't around, blah blah handwritten document, back to the P of the 1st P, who almost registered the van, but sent me out empty handed and said come back with a current Missouri inspection tag.

We did some other stuff. Now I'm home for one hour before my home group. If you want to talk to me, fill out these fourteen forms in triplicate and fax them to the Ukraine. I'll be right with you.


  1. It's ok, supern8, don't be lonely!

  2. Thanks...I won't. I've got the trinity to keep me company!

  3. Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God almighty who was and is and is to come....
    With all creation I sing....
    You are my everything and I will adore you...-G

  4. Smartlypants:

    We are looking for answers, entertain us!-G

  5. did you SEE my day?
    I got nothin left

  6. blah blah blah

    you are blessed blessed blessed

    dont forget that

  7. well, duh. I just mean the humor, she are zapped.

  8. Belly aching!
    At least you have the money to pay for those dang drivers license. I'm stuck in my motor wheelchair with no home to plug my battery changer into. I’m stuck here forever!

  9. but I do have internet access.

  10. Mr. Slim, I don't know if I know you. I guess you are not who I thought you were.-G

  11. G,
    Perhaps you do know me, and my wheelchairs story is just a story.

    But, I do really have internet access.

  12. Shown below, is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an 86 year old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.

    Dear Sir:

    I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.

    By my calculations,three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer,of course,to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension,an arrangement which,I admit, has been in place for only eight years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank. My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.

    I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, --- when I try to contact you,I am confronted by the impersonal,overcharging,pre-recorded,faceless entity which your bank has become.

    From now on,I,like you,choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check,addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

    Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me,there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public,and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof. In due course, at MY convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service.As they say,imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

    Let me level the playing field even further.

    When you call me, press buttons as follows:

    #1. To make an appointment to see me
    #2. To query a missing payment.
    #3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
    #4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping
    #5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
    #6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home
    #7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to that Authorized Contact mentioned earlier.
    #8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
    #9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.
    #10. This is a second reminder to press* for English. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.

    Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?

    Your Humble Client

    (Remember: This was written by an 86 year old woman) 'YA JUST GOTTA LOVE " US SENIORS" !!!!!

    And remember: Don't make old ladies mad. They don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to set them off.

  13. I think you are John, Are you not?-G

  14. I like the old lady story. I would like to do that too.-G

  15. Jess,

    Has Mr. Slim ever revealed himself?-G

  16. mr slim is the old lady

  17. Are you John Allen?-G

  18. You can whisper it in my ear.-G

  19. I've lost 5 pounds.
    I'm so happy!

  20. Dinner is ready, Hubby.
    We're having chili, 5-way!

  21. this is a strange sequence of comments....


    sorry jess for all of your gas-blowing escapades all over kansas and missouri

    poor you

    glad you all survived...

  22. I am not John Allen.

  23. such incompetence at the dmv has been experienced before.
    I was tortured by their 'system" last year. Does anyone wanna hear bout it?

  24. banks are not our friends. they use your money to make a huge profit in the global economy, and if you need to borrow any money from the bank they charge a huge interest rate (7% - 18%)compared to the 1% - 2% (3% if you're lucky) they give their depositers.
    bypass the banks and invest it for true growth

  25. Hey Baby...........

    Happy Tuesday!

    Miss U

  26. Beth-
    Yes, that's true...and great if you have extra dinero sitting around! But most of us need access to those funds more often than not, and a bank is cheaper and more convenient in that case.
    But for true investing? Absolutely invest!

  27. Crazy DMV-- I wonder if they just make it hard so you will appriciate it more when you finally get your license... kind of twisted. That would be hard with 3 kids.

    Beth/Nate- agree with you both on banking vs. investing. Have a decent bank savings account to cover any immediate needs that could arise (car/home repairs, medical bills, less work income), but invest if you have a little extra that you don't need. Even putting into a secure money market fund will get you 3 - 5% more than sitting in the bank, and that adds up over time.

  28. Jess- would you say that a talking GPS system for your van would be a good Christmas present? Wait, Christmas is too far away... how about an Easter present?

  29. I'll be taking some students to the rodeo on Thursday. Toby Keith, yeehaww

  30. I have the best / largest / most available / sure fire / guaranteed bank account imaginable.


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