It looks like we may be coming to the end of this stage of the adoption process. By that, I mean, the stage where we do adoption stuff with no "real" baby in sight. We were selected by a birthfamily last week, and unless they change their mind, we're matched!
It is really exciting and very surreal to take in. The baby, a boy, is due in mid-November. We're planning on it being pretty open, but I still want to keep in mind that his birthfamily may come across this blog, and for that reason, and just general respect for their privacy, I will be careful what I say.
It's tricky ground emotionally. Yesterday at Wal-mart, I was looking at baby clothes, just thinking, and I couldn't bring myself to buy anything. The 6 year anniversary of my twin's due date was last week, and there's definitely some of that emotion mixed in here. This is different, really, because I'm not looking at coming home empty-handed, like I did with them. If this baby's parents decide to parent him, then we'll wait for another baby, and eventually there will be another baby. Still, I am having a hard time imagining looking at an empty carseat on Thanksgiving.
But back to this baby, and the here and now. He's Caucasian, which was kind of a surprise for us, since we've planned on a transracial adoption all this time. It's okay, though. I like white babies, too. I have a couple of them I'm pretty nuts about, actually.
He has some heart issues, most of which appear to be minor and should correct during the rest of her pregnancy or at birth, without surgery. Pray for resolution there.
You know what's NUTS? I think this whole adoption is paid for. A LOT of individuals gave so generously in the beginning and all along the way, and then we had the fundraiser in Texas, and then we sold shirts, and the Helping Hand set us up with the matching grant, and Get Real Food Co and a bunch of individuals gave toward the matching fund, as well as Captured Conference , who took an offering for the matching grant, and then the Zoe Foundation gave a generous grant, and we've used rebates and returns and little inheritances and man... as far as I know right now, our needs will be met as they appear.
We'll hold off on having a shower until things are more solid, maybe even after he's born, but we'll need diapers and little boy clothes, I know that much. Can you believe this? I don't think I can, yet.