Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Buying the cow: We say yes

We've decided. We are going to stop shacking up with our house and MARRY it. (if you loooove it so much, why don't you marry it??) You know, bloggerati, that we have been tossed by the winds and whatnot for the last couple of months. We decided to try to buy this place, and then the mortgage guy was all, like, well, you have enough MONEY, and you are legal, tax-paying citizens, and all, but your debt:income ratio tells me that you are NO GOOD.

So I quit thinking about buying this house. We can pay off this and that, and reorganize, but not by October 1st. Funny thing, though. Evidently my landlord and landlady read my blog. Hi guys! :) And they were gracious enough to allow us another 6 month lease while we get qualified to buy it. That changed everything. There's no question we qualify, it's just lining up all the numbers.

I'm excited. I've never lived in my own place, that I could change without someone else's permission. Of course, I'll still have to get approval from my priesthood head. (New here? I got that term from a FLDS tell-all book and plan to use it as much as possible) I'm on a rampage in my mind, knocking down walls and painting things.

Yesterday, we went to Lowes and bought some handles, and I mentioned offhandedly that I am painting the kitchen yellow, eventually. Back story: anyone who has sat on my couch has probably heard me say I'm painting the kitchen yellow. I have had multiple conversations with the MOG re: painting the kitchen yellow. Still, there he stood in the handle aisle at Lowes, looking at me with scorn and derision. It seems SOME people think I'm not painting the kitchen yellow. I'm so submissive, I shall wait until he goes on tour before I paint the kitchen yellow.

I guess we'll be homeowners in Missouri, and my grandchildren will be idiots.  All of you people, except the psychos, should come visit and bring a hammer and a paintbrush.

You know what else is great about this? We are homestudy approved in this house, so there won't need to be any more paperwork and such to stay adopting-able. Shut up, that's totally a word.


  1. FLDS? I thought you had been joking about Richy visiting his other wives in Utah..... guess I was wrong! I think I know why you were reading that book!

    My kitchen is yellow. It will probably always be yellow as I have no desire to paint. Or do anything in the kitchen, really. :)

  2. whahoo! i was hoping you'd keep that house!

  3. Awesome blog. You crack me up. Mama

  4. I <3 you Jess & I'm glad you're buying a house :) - & I think you're children will remain Texans at heart because they were born there & Toby the Genius won't let his siblings be idiots. They too will be rock stars!

  5. yellow is a good color for a kitchen......

    and....... yippeeeee

    HEY FYI I just found out that you absolutely must have someone who knows look at a wall before you tear it down... if it is a weight bearing wall.... it must stay.

  6. Did the ceiling fall in VKG?-G


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