I suffer from a condition called Obnoxiousness. No doubt someone you know and love has it. One of the side effects of being obnoxious is Post-Party Regret.
As a child, I was some kind of hyperactive. I was never diagnosed with anything, in fact, I am realizing as I type this, I was never diagnosed with anything. Did you guys even ever take me to the doctor, Mama? Like for a cold or an ear infection or anything? Anyway. I bounced off the walls, called the radio station and did funny voices, tap danced in the hallway, and was banned from birthday parties with introvert moms. At school I racked up "tallies" (which were a sort of demerit system) for talking, because I couldn't seem to shut up. Ever.
My parents would put me on a no-sugar diet every couple of months, and then realize it didn't make any difference and abandon the idea. Those weeks without sugar were awful. Here I was, obnoxious, and now I was dealing with chocolate withdrawals.
So now, as an adult, I have basically learned how to shut it down and be a normal, kind of normal person. My condition flares up under the following events: I meet a new group of people, or I have a party. All the sudden, I can't quit telling jokes, and I'm laughing too loud and talking over everyone, and the new people are laughing with this wide-eyed nervous expression and I'm thinking sloooow dooooowwn you're going over the top but I can't stop because at least they're laughing and I'm a sucker for a good crowd.
I wake up the next morning with Post-Party Regret and the taste of old queso in my mouth. What did I say? I think. Did I really say everyone from Ohio is like that? Did I go too far? Why did I say that one joke that wasn't even funny? Did I leave an open can of Coke on the table for Toby to find? (Toby also suffers from Obnoxiousness) I'd imagine it's similar to waking up with a hangover, although I've never had a hangover. In fact, I don't drink at all, ever, (crazy family history) although I have been questioned about being drunk on more than one occasion, while being obnoxious.
I have a few friends who also have Obnoxiousness, and it's always nice to be at a party with them, because we just self-destruct on each other and spill salsa on the couch and laugh at ourselves, and all the normal people just, you know, act normal. Ah, enablers.