He had an ear infection, so she called in a prescription to Target.
It wasn't ready, so I tried on some clearance jeans, but they wouldn't zip up.
Depressed, I took the baby to the snack bar and ate some nachos while he downed a bottle.
Only ate a couple because the baby was fussy, so I took the leftovers to the trash, but the THANK YOU door to the trash can bounced back and slapped the bowl of cheese out of my hand, sending it in a glorious arching flight across the floor, my shoe, and the hem of my fat jeans.
And that's how it goes.
(Disclaimer: I'm actually feeling pretty cheerful, I just thought it was kinda funny)
As I was writing this, a bloodcurdling scream came from the linen closet. It was Toby, who went to bed an hour and a half ago. I opened the closet to find a panicked Toby screaming, finger pointed behind me. I was pretty concerned that it was a demon or a burglar or something, due to the screaming and the shaking outstretched finger, but it was a papercut, which he got from reading an animal encyclopedia in the linen closet 90 minutes after he went to bed. Because my life is NORMAL.
Your blogs never fail to make me laugh! I can't wait until my little one is up and moving (I'm sure I'll regret that statement later).
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