vanity, mediocrity and the internet

You know, I coulda sworn that Louisa May Alcott said "A woman with a sense of humor could never be vain," but I can't find it anywhere on the internet. Maybe it was somebody else, but again, the Google doesn't bring up any quote like that. For that reason, I will claim it as my own, and now Google will credit me with the quote of some famous literary feminist, who would probably find my Republican housewife ways to be distasteful. No matter, I said it. A woman with a sense of humor could never really be vain.

I've built a little bit of a reputation over here about being a slacker. I make people feel better, they say. It's nice to have some honesty about motherhood, they say. And hey, I'm all about honesty. Well, to a degree. I still kick the diapers out of the frame before I instagram, so....

I'm just being a tad introspective here. So I was thinking about how I feel so much more comfortable sharing my failures than my successes. I mean, if I made a cake and I totally KILLED it, in a positive sense, that would be way less fun than, for example, my Rainbow Cake. Or like, when someone is amazing at lots of things, it makes me a little bit eye-rolly and rebellious because I can't do all that stuff, or I don't want to do the work to do it. You know what I mean?

token introspective pic

And I know there's a whole fake world out there, with social media and lies. So we're all a little skeptical. So I think I swing to the other side of the pendulum and only talk about things that don't seem like even remotely false or vain. Like eating. I never, or rarely, talk about when I try to eat good. I went a week without a Coke and ate meat and veggies. For a week. Nary a photo. But then when I jump blindly into a pit of brownies and queso, I'm all like, check me out! What is that?

Something about being a goof-off is way easier than trying. Nobody cool wants to seem too earnest. I mean, I was SO that kid with my hand always raised because I had the answer, and then around 3rd grade I figured out overachieving was frowned upon and took my permanent role as the jester with a secret side of genius. I feel conflicted about that, on one hand I hate that mediocrity is celebrated while exceptionalism is frowned on, because philosophically I disagree with that. On the other hand, I think people should not take themselves so seriously, seriously. Seriously.

Anyway. It's not like I'm going to wrap up here with a punch. I'll just fade out slowly without making a solid point, because I'm still thinking about all this. And besides, solid points are so earnest.